Lester Limber Legs was dad’s greatest competition in the Saturday night frolicks held at Garfield High in the 1930’s. He was so limber he could extend and kick his left brogan shoe behind his back without missing a beat. It was a rare treat to see in person, as unbelievable as it was.
Dad’s competition name was Jitterbug Johnson. When he guzzled down a mason jar full of corn whiskey, nobody could beat or match his unique foot style. His dance partner was Sally Bell Samples. They were a sight on the dance floor because dad was slender as a bean pole, while Sally Bell was more than pleasingly plump. But when their favorite song was played, “Roll out the barrell”, it took your breath away; they were spectacular in their unique dance steps.
On the night of the biggest dance competition in years, dad made a fatal mistake. After he had a belly full of powerful and potent corn whiskey, he spooned out a large bowl of leftover lima beans from dinner on the cookstove. When the competition began, dad was feeling no pain – the corn whiskey was giving him renewed confidence. He told his partner Sally Bell, “we got this one!” He and Sally Bell were strutting and dancing circles around Lester Limber Legs and his partner, and then it happened; wave after wave of sour, fermented whiskey mixed with smelly half-digested lima beans shot out from dad’s mouth and spewed across the dance floor. Some flew onto Sally Bell’s favorite dress of gingham and expensive lace. The competition had unexpectedly ended and the clock struck the final hour, and Lester Limber Legs had won by default.
