If there is one thing Southerners have perfected, it is the art of saying goodbye. And by “saying goodbye,” I mean announcing that you are leaving at least three or four times before you actually make it out the door.
It usually starts with someone saying, “Well, I guess we better get going.” That should be the end of the visit. But we all know it never is.
As soon as everyone starts getting up, someone remembers one more story they wanted to tell. Then someone else has a question. Before you know it, everyone is sitting back down like the goodbye announcement never happened.
Eventually, you make another attempt. “Well, y’all, we really do need to go.” And this time, you actually make it to the front door.
But that’s not the end. This is where the porch conversation starts.
You may spend another 15-20 minutes talking about the weather, what somebody’s cousin’s-aunt’s-uncle’s-sister is doing, what happened at church on Sunday or where everyone is meeting to eat next weekend.
Then comes the driveway goodbye. We have officially made it to your vehicle. Then we hug everyone, say your final “bye y’all,” get in the car and crank it up.
Surely, now you’re leaving. But not quite. Someone walks over to the driver’s side window. “I forgot to tell you something.”
And there you are, rolling the window down for what you know will probably be another 10-minute conversation. You wave. You smile.
And if you’re really Southern, you may even stop by the mailbox and roll the window down one more time to yell, “Love y’all!”
It really sounds ridiculous when put in words. Why does this simple task take us forever Why does it take us so long to leave? Maybe, there’s actually something special about the Southern goodbye.
We live in a world where no one slows down. We rush to work, rush home, rush to the next appointment and constantly think about what comes next.
Southern goodbyes force us to slow down by giving us a few extra minutes to talk, laugh, and share with people we care about.
I believe that is why we keep finding new things to talk about. Maybe we aren’t really struggling to leave, that we just don’t want the visit to end.
The next time you find yourself standing in someone’s driveway 30 minutes after you said goodbye, don’t worry about it. You’re not late, you’re just Southern. And around here, goodbye has never really meant goodbye.
